This review is intended for all those TAMS students who don’t have cars and depend on their own two feet to get them around town. I decided to review a place that was accessible by foot. Located in the Carriage Hill Shopping Center near the intersection of Ave. C and I-35, Pancho’s Mexican Buffet is a favorite among poor college males who are much more interested in quantity than quality. Sure, you might have to throw down around $6 for a buffet, but this buffet could potentially fill you up for the next 2 days. Since the average person eats 3 meals a day, this translates into a mere $1 per meal.

This lunch was unique for several reasons. Russ was out of town in Arkansas at the annual SWACUCOOHOHAWEEWEEHO mid-year conference. So it was just Henry, Gloria, and myself kickin’ it for lunch. Before we ever left out the door of McConnell, Gloria hands Henry and I a sheet of paper with several questions on it and entitled “SL4 Lunch Discussion Topics”. If you remember from Russ’ last review, Gloria had an emotional outburst in the middle of our lunch in which she expressed her disapproval and boredom with our normal lunch conversation and threatened to call all the “discussion shots” the next time we went to lunch. Since I knew I would be reviewing the next lunch, realizing it would be great fodder from my article, I challenged her to follow through with her threat. More on the discussion topics in a moment…

As soon as we walked through the doors, we were met with Pancharian propaganda claiming that a diet full of fresh cheap Mexican buffets is part of a balanced diet. Once in line, Henry’s eyes instantly locked with the manager behind the counter. “Henry,” the manager asked, “is that really you?” Henry replied, “I haven’t seen you since the 1988 cubby scouts pine car derby!” Apparently Henry and the manager, Russell, used to run around together in Boy Scouts back in the day. Russell, following the Boy Scout Law, was very helpful as we attempted to discern the exact nature of the food options in the line. Henry opted for the partially hydrogenated meat filled tortillas covered with various synthetic colorful toppings. He also ordered a side of Mexican spaghetti – it was Russell’s favorite. I ordered something similar, but also asked for a couple of soggily fried corn tortillas wrapped around various meat fat trimmings. Gloria, after protesting that her family had taken a “no ponchos” oath, broke down and ordered some random selections including her trademark pick at SL4 lunches – a salad.

 

Once we sat down, the Gloria mandated discussion topics began. I must admit, I had high hopes. I thought SL4 discussions were always deep and meaningful and was a bit confused why Gloria felt the need to change things. But I guess in-depth deliberations on the future of American democracy, just war theory, religion and American society, trends in adolescent development, the purpose of life, and the relationship between media in culture has just not been interesting enough for her. Surely the questions she came up with were going to be life-changing! You can imagine my disillusionment when she rattled off the first question: “Did you prefer the 1st, 2nd, or 3rd Jurassic Park and why?” But Gloria had an underlying point in asking this question – she was using the movie merely as a set-up for a deeper discussion on the relationship between science and ethics. In fact all of her questions were quite thoughtful and yielded great discussion between the 3 of us.

If I had one critique, it would be on the fact that Gloria had to write these questions down on paper. It reminded me of when I dated a girl named Daisy my freshman year in high school. Daisy was a saxophone player in the Hoover High School marching band and I was a snare drum player in the drumline. Due to the lack of reliable transportation, freshman lovers typically don’t go out on dates very often. The relationship basically consisted of holding hands in the hallway, having my arm around her on the couch at an after-football game party, and long, painful phone conversations. For some reason, she convinced me that we needed to talk on the phone at least once a day for at least 30 minutes. My conversation-intitiative skills had yet to be developed at this time in my life, so I dreaded each call – yet I wanted them to be successful so that Daisy wouldn’t leave me for my friend Tommy (another snare drummer in band). So I had come up with 2 techniques. One was to get us both to talk on the phone in front of the same television program – that way most of the time would be taken up in watching the show and all I had to do was merely comment on what we were watching during the commercials. The other technique involved coming up with a list of questions, significant events that happened in my life since I saw her 3 hours before in marching band practice, and other such attempts at keeping the conversation ball rolling. Any time someone approaches what is normally a time for casual conversation with notes full of talking points in hand, I have visions of my 9th grade self on the phone with Daisy.

Well, Ponchos can bring about good conversation and bad digestion. Gloria tells us that she had heartburn for several hours after our visit. But since nervousness also is a major contributor to the over-production of stomach acids, perhaps her ailment is more the result of the above-described “Daisy syndrome”. But nevertheless, I would not suggest going to Poncho’s unless you absolutely have to. Mexican food is too good to be treated that way.